Dumb blonde jokes
Q: Why do blondes take the pill?
A: So they know what day of the week it is. A redhead tells her blonde stepsister, "I slept with a Brazilian...." The blonde replies, "Oh my God! You slut! How many is a brazilian?"
Q: Why do blondes wear their hair up?
A: To catch everything that goes over their heads.
Q: What does a blonde and a beer bottle have in common?
A: They're both empty from the neck up.
Q: Why was the blonde upset when she got her Driver's License?
A: Because she got an "F" in sex.
Q: What does a blonde do when her laptop computer freezes?
A: She sticks it in the microwave!
Q: Why did God give blondes 2 more brain cells than horses?
A: So they don't shit in the parade.
Q: What is it called when a blonde blows in another blonde's ear?
A: Data transfer.
Q: What's the mating call of the blonde?
A: "I'm sooooo drunk!"
Q: What do you call 10 blondes standing ear to ear?
A: A wind tunnel.
Q: Why are blondes bad at Hide and Seek?
A: Because they can never find the sausage.
Q: How do you get a blonde off of her knees?
A: Cum.
Q: What is a cool refreshing drink for a blonde?
A: Perri-air.
Q: How did the blonde try to kill the bird?
A: She threw it off a cliff. Imitation of a blonde refuelling.. (Flap hand, blowing air into ears)
Q: Why did the blonde stare at frozen orange juice can for 2 hours?
A: Because it said 'concentrate'.
Q: What do you call 10 blondes at the bottom of a pool?
A: Air Pockets
Q: What's five miles long and has an IQ of forty?
A: A blonde parade.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde who gave her cat a bath?
A: She still hasn't gotten all the hair off her tongue.
Q: Why do blondes wear ponytails?
A: To hide the valve stem!
Q: What goes: vroooom-schreech, vrooom-schreech, vroooom-schreech?
A: A blonde at a flashing red light
Q: How do you confuse a blonde?
A: Ask her to alphabetize a bag of M&Ms.
Q: What do you call a blonde holding a balloon?
A: Siamese twins
Q: What do you call an eternity?
A: Four Blondes in four cars at a four way stop.
Q: Why do Blondes have TGIF written on their shoes?
A: Toes Go In First.
Q: Why do Blondes always smile during lightning storms?
A: They think their picture is being taken.
Q: Why do blondes make bad bankrobbers?
A: Because they tie up the safe and blow the guards
Q: What happens when a blonde gets Alzheimers disease?
A: Her IQ goes up!
Q: How can you tell a blonde has used your computer?
A: There is white out on the screen.
Q: How do you change a blonde's mind? A1: Blow in her ear. A2: Buy her another beer.
Q: What does a blonde say when you blow in their ear?
A: "Thanks for the refill!"
Q: How do you kill a Blonde?
A: Put a Scratch 'n Sniff at the bottom of a pool.
Q: Why did the blonde have square tits?
A: Because she forgot to take the tissues out of the boxes.
Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain?
A: Gifted!
Q: What did the blonde do when she heard that 90% of accidents occur around the home?
A: She moved.
Q: Why don't blondes get coffee breaks?
A: It takes too long to retrain them.
Q: Why was the blondes' belly button sore?
A: Because her boyfriend was blonde too.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde who stayed up all night to see where the sun went?
A: It finally dawned on her!
Q: How does a blonde turn on the light after sex?
A: Opens the car door.
Q: Why do blondes wear hooped ear rings.
A: So they have somewhere to put their feet when having sex.
Q: What do you say to a blonde that won't come home with you?
A: "Have another beer."
Q: How do you drown a blonde?
A: Tape a mirror to the bottom of a pool.
Q: How do you kill a blonde?
A: Give her a gun and say it's a hair drier.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde who had two chances to get pregnant?
A: She blew them both
Q: Why did God invent orgasms?
A: So blondes know when to stop screwing.
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a brick?
A: If you lay a brick it doesn't follow you around for two weeks.
Q: What happened to the blonde Ice Hockey Team?
A: They drowned in Spring Training
Q: Why were there 6 bullet holes in the blondes mirror?
A: She tried to kill her self
Q: How does a horny guy spell relief?
A: B.L.O.N.D.E.
Q: Why don't blondes talk when having sex?
A: Their Mommies told them never to speak to strangers.
Q: whats the differance between a blonde and a mosquito?
A: When you slap the blonde she keeps on sucking.
Q: What is the difference between blondes and traffic signs?
A: Some traffic signs say stop
Q: How can you tell if a blonde has a vibrator?
A: By the chipped tooth. Q. Why are only 2% of blondes touch typists? A. The other 98% are huntin' peckers
Q: How do you know if a Blonde has been using your computer?
A: The joystick is still wet.
Q: Why don't blondes call 911 in an emergency?
A: They can't remember the number.
Q: Why did the blonde tattoo her zip-code on her thigh?
A: She wanted a lot of male in her box.
Q: What can strike a blonde without her even knowing it?
A: A thought.
Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?
A: Run like hell, she has a grenade in her hand.
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